I hate this feeling.
Lets be honest here. Yes, I met a guy this week. Hes fantastic, hes funny and hes beautiful. He is absolutely fabulous.
And the best part is, he likes me too. This amazing guy that I like likes me back.
AND GOD DAMN IT IM LONELY!
Im so fucking lonely in my life and he makes it better.
I keep telling myself that I need to be single for awhile. That thats what I really need. But I dont want to miss out on this chance. This chance to be with someone who I think honestly cares.
But everyone has to get all fucking butt hurt about the fact that I didnt choose them. All I want is to not be lonely any more.
I want someone to care, I want someone to hug me and I want to show this guy everything that I am. I want him to know everything about me. But I feel guilty about it. He likes that I eat oatmeal for lunch. He likes that I get really excited about things and he likes that Im weird.
He tells me how special I am and how he cant wait for me to be ready to be in a relationship because he wants to be the guy Im in it with.
The thing is, I could see it. I could see us having a good relationship.
Im going to throw up.
I cant stop crying.